A GIFT THAT WENT BAD............

What I thought would be a cute gift to give my wife years ago after a disagreement sure got me into deeper trouble. Can't live with them; can't live without them???????????????

MY MOHAWK HAIRCUT..........

Back in the day when in school there were always fads that kids would try to be different. I guess it's not any different than what kids do today. The old pink shirt fade; almost all the cool boys were wearing them. By the time I had enough money to buy one they were out of style. I think I might have worn mine two or three times. Yeah, I was almost always the last to get in style with the current trend.
My next door neighbor, Henry was in the same boat with me. We were best buddies. We sold newspapers, mowed yards, dug fishing worms to sell and any other odd jobs a young boy could do to earn money. Both of our parents were poor and lived from paycheck to paycheck. There wasn't much money left from Dad's earning after providing the basic needs for our family of five.
I had seen an older boy who had a haircut that was so different from everyone else. All the young boys in school either had a crew cut or a flat top haircut. Man, if me and Henry got one of those haircuts they call a Mohawk we would be the coolest boys in school. We begin to talk and laugh about when we went to get our next haircut we would get a Mohawk.
The day finally rolled around and we were off to the barber shop. Mr. Trawick's shop was located upstairs over the town's only drugstore. We had to wait while he finished cutting an old man's hair." Henry, your next," as Henry climbs into the chair. " How do you want yours cut??? Give me a Mohawk, Henry says and Mr. Trawick proceeds to scalp Henry's head all except a strip of hair running from the middle of his head to the back of his neck. After seeing what the Mohawk looks like on Henry's head I'm thinking I'm not going to get that kind of haircut( boy did I have second thoughts)
Once in the barber chair, "how do you want your haircut??" Give me a flat top Mr Trawick!! Henry, " Nick you are a chicken, if you don't get a Mohawk I'm going to whip your butt (and he probably could)" Give me a Mohawk!! (one BAD decision) When I got home I was in big trouble with MOM. Son, what in the world were you thinking. People will think you don't have any sense; get me the belt. Man did this 12 year old get a good whipping. I should have took a chance on Henry giving me a whipping; at least I could have fought back. Looking back my hair was never the same after that awful looking haircut. No, we didn't start a new fad in school. Everyone laughed and made fun of us. They call me Tonto and Henry Paleface.

It was different!!

BARBER SHOP PRANK...........................

I guess men are not all that different from women when they go to get their haircut at the barber shop. We get to hear the latest news, gossip and political views from the barbers and their clients.
One of the barbers where I got my haircut was a classmate of mine while we were attending high school. A son of a preacher man that was very strict on his son. Jerry was a great singer and piano player. He could sing and play the piano just like Jerry Lee Lewis' song, " Whole Lot Of Shaking Going On."
His father was also a barber and had his shop in front of their house in a small building. One day he came into the house and we were up in Jerry's room and he was playing and singing, " Whole Lot Of Shaking Going On." Jerry's father hollered up at him to stop singing and playing that Rock and Roll. " Jerry if you must play and sing; do some gospel music."
Jerry did play and sing gospel music later in life with a Gospel Quartet he formed.
Once at Jerry's barber shop years ago, Jerry had a pair of trick glasses that he kept on the counter with the tools of his trade. Once seated in his barber chair he would take a person's glasses off while he cut their hair. When he finished he would clean the glasses and hand them back to the client. Paul, was finished with his haircut and Jerry gave him back his cleaned glasses. Paul paid for the haircut and put his glasses on and headed for the door with everyone watching. He was having trouble finding the doorknob with the trick glasses on. He replied in a very serious voice, "I THINK I'M GOING BLIND." Everyone's laughter gave Paul a clue that he had been had with those trick glasses. The funny part, the glasses looked just like the ones he wore.

BUS TRIP ACROSS AMERICA......CYBER STYLE........... FINAL

The old bus is traveling down the interstate with Wade at the wheel. On board we find our original tourist and the five hookers we rescued from the Mustang Ranch. I think Chuck and Pat have become an item after leaving the ranch. Wade, " I think we are far enough ahead of Madame Col's force that we can stop up ahead and see the largest roadrunner in the world." Wade pulls the bus to a stop in New Mexico at a recycling plant. Feast your eyes on this metal 20 foot roadrunner. All but the hookers are out of the bus taking photos of the metal bird. The roadrunner is the State bird of New Mexico. The real bird not the metal one!!



OK, back on the bus............................................What Bus????? The bus is gone with the five hookers; they have stole our bus. Wade, why did you leave the keys in the bus??? NickO, " I left the motor running so the hookers could run the heater." We are in a mess for sure with no wheels. Wade," I saw an old school bus back up the road with a For Sale sign on it." I'll walk back up there and try to buy old yellow." Wade returns about an hour later with the school bus. "Get on guys and gals I know everyone is hungry so let's find a place to eat."  Up ahead we pull into Mabel's bar and Grille parking lot. This time Wade makes sure to take the keys with him. Inside orders of burgers, fries and beer settles every ones nerves. Our waitress tells us that some ladies were in the establishment just ahead of us in an old bus and were talking going to Cancun Mexico to go into business for themselves.Poor Chuck is heart broken??? All the other tourist are glad to get rid of those hookers. Wade is even a little sad??? A sad Wade is indeed a sight to behold. Well gang the trip is about over so load back up on the bus we are going home.

BUS TRIP ACROSS AMERICA.......CYBER STYLE..............

We are at the Mustang Ranch where Chuck entered over 6 hours ago. The group has become concerned about why he hasn't come out so we can continue out trip. Wade, " I'm going in to use the bathroom and see what has happen to Chuck." " Good friends don't let friends down." Hurry back Wade the group is getting restless.
Wade has been gone for over an hour and now everyone on the bus is alarmed with why the two haven't come out of the Ranch??? An ambulance has just pulled up to the front door to the Ranch; I'm going to see what's going on. " hey, driver do you know what's happening inside??" We received a call that someone inside needs medical attention he's having chest pains, that's all I know.
20 minutes later a big burly man appears out the front door and ask, " who is in charge here??" I'm NickO, as I shake his hand. " I'm HippyDave and I'm the Bouncer here at the ranch." Madame Col. is holding your two people as hostages. She wants you to come inside and listen to her demands. The one y'all call Chuck is having a heart attack. Ok, I'm coming inside!! ( Well hasn't this trip turned into a disaster??)
Inside we find Chuck being attended too by the EMT's. Wade is tied up to a chair. "NickO you better listen to that woman's demands!!" " I run this place , I'm Madame Col. Your friends are being held since the one having chest pains wouldn't pay for the services he received. The one in the chair was just at the wrong place at the right time so I'm holding both of them till the bill is paid. Wade, " you better pay her NickO, Chuck has run up a $900.00 bill, no wonder he's having chest pains." I don't have that kind of cash on me. Madame, would you take my Vista?? "Yes, I will take your card." Ok. let them go since I have paid Chuck's bill." The EMTs inform me that Chuck didn't have a heart attack after all, he is only suffering from exhaustion.
As we are about to leave the room a woman voice calls out, "Take me with you, they are holding me against my will, my name is Loverdreams and I'm from Indonesia. Take me too, my name is Patmoor and I lived in Minnesota. Girls from all walks of life are wanting to go with us and how can we refuse. Smartjane from Brazil, Amalie from Denmark, Asksnowflake from Alaska and Isis from France. Madame Col, " You girls are in big trouble if you leave with them. You think it's bad now just wait till we hunt you down and bring you back!!!!"
All are running for the bus and Wade is taking the wheel and we are out of here in a flash!!!

Next time: What are we going to do with all these HOOKERS?
Why was Chuck so exhausted. Maybe Pat??

BUS SIGHT SEEING TRIP ACROSS AMERICA.....CYBER STYLE..

Time to hit the road again. We stayed a few days in Akely, Minnesota to rest up on the next leg of our trip. Today we bid old Paul Bunyan farewell. " Wade, " can I drive the bus, can I??? I don't know Wade?? You have the flare for the unexpected in our travels. What do you passengers think should we let him drive?? Show of hands and everybody says yes!! Might be a HUGE mistake?? Ok, Wade get behind the wheel of this old bus and promise you will be on your best behavior and drive safe????? EERRRRRR............spinning wheels as Wade applies gas to the old bus!!! Hey Wade I forgot to tell you this bus has one of those old 428 Hemi. She's old but fast. Flora is holding on to her seat and looks a little mad. Dakota hollers out; floor it Wade. Mia just about ruined her expensive camera. Poor old Loish is heard saying, " I should have stayed home."
Wade has calmed down and is driving great and yells out we are almost in Alliance, Nebraska. It's the home of Carhenge. Carhenge, what kind of sight is that Wade asks Mia?? It's a sight that copies the famous Stonehenge in England but it's with cars. It's an odd sight to behold!! Look out to the right there she blows. Everyone is out of the bus as Wade comes to a stop and are in awe with this sight.



Loish, " That was amazing; who in the world did this??" Wade, some fellow who didn't want to use the land to plant corn." LMAO!! Look out Texas here we come!! On the road again, on the road again as the radio blurs out an old Willie Nelson song. The old bus is into the Great State of Texas and we need to pick up Chuck in Fort Worth. Wade has the GPS programed with Chuck's address and we will be stopping around the corner from his house so his neighbors want see him getting on the bus. " Turn left in 1.5 of a mile.........Turn right in 600 feet.........you have reached your destination. Wade, " I love this GPS, it sure beats having to listen to your wife give directions." The bus is stopped and Chuck has entered and greets every body with a big Texas HUG. Well he hugged all the women and handskakes for the men, both of us. Wade, Flora wants to go see the Cadillac Ranch in Amarillo. Chuck, " I've been there and it's a sight to behold." Off again to another odd sight. Dakota, " I've heard of that place, they have a number of old Cadillac cars buried in the ground with there nose up in the air." This is going to be a blast???? Chuck. "Turn on the next road to the left and it will be on the right side of the road." WOW!!!!!!!!look at all those pink cars in that field!!!! Cameras are out and flashing. Mia is walking around looking for that perfect shot??? Flora is speechless, imagine that?? Dakota and Loish aren't very impressed. Dakota," why in the world would they ruin those good Cadillacs??"




Everyone back on the bus, Wade I'll rest you and drive to our next stop. OK, NickO, thanks. "Aint he sweet" well that's what his wife says. Nevada and the Mustang Ranch is our next stop. Nevada is the only state where prostitution is legal. The famous Mustang Ranch has been shut down by the IRS, run by the government for a while, sold several times, burnt down but always makes a comeback. Sold on Ebay for the sum of 145,100 the new owner moved the buildings to his property in Patrick, Nv. and refurbished the old buildings and it's business as usual. Chuck and Wade are off the bus in a hurry!! Chuck is entering the business, I don't think he will be in there long??? Wade you amazed me in not going in there with Chuck??




Will Chuck ever come out of the Mustang Ranch?? Will Wade stay on his best behavior?? Find out next time the old bus is rolling down the highway.