Entry for January 16, 2007 HOW'S THAT AGAIN??

Some CHURCH BULLETIN BOARDS BLOPPERS
1. This afternoon there will be a meeting in the south and north ends of the Church. Children will be baptized at both ends.
2. Thursday at 5:00 p.m. there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All wishing to be Little Mothers will please meet the pastor in his study.
3. This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Rose to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.
4. Ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind, and they can be seen in the Church basement on Friday afternoon.
5. On Sunday, a special collection will be taken to defray the expence of the new carpet. All wishing to do something on the carpet, please come forward and get a piece of paper.
6. Tonight's Sermon: WHAT IS HELL?? Come early and listen to our choir practicing.
7. Another marriage- encounter weekend is being offered. It's a chance for a weekend away for just you and your souse.
HUMOR CAN BE FOUND IN ANYTHING WRITTEN!!

Entry for January 11, 2007 COWBOY BOOTS!!!!

Anyone who has ever dressed a kid will love this!
A Tennessee teacher was helping one of her kindergarden students put on his cowboy boots. He asked for help and she could see why.
Even with her pulling and him pushing the little boots didn't want to go on his feet. By the time they got the second boot on the teacher had worked up quite a sweat. She almost cried when the little boy said," teacher they're on the wrong feet." Sure enought they were. It wasn't any easier getting the boots off as it was getting them on. She managed to keep her cool as together they worked to get the boots off his feet. Back on they strugged again with the ill fitting boots. Once on the right feet, he said, " These aren't my boots" "Why didn't you say so!!!" She bit her tongue rather than get right in his face. Off came those durn boots once more, then he said, " They're my brother's boots, my mom made me wear them." Now she didn't know if she should laugh or cry, but she mustered up what courage she had left and wrestled those boots back on again.
Helping him into his coat she asked," where are your mittens??" He said, I stuffed them in the toes of my boots.""
THE TEACHER WILL BE ELIGIBLE FOR PAROLE IN THREE YEARS!!!!!!